Au revoir

Thank you all for keeping up with this blog. As most of you know, I am officially safe and sound back in the United States once again. I miss Paris greatly, but I am forever changed by my experience there. I hope to return again someday, and hopefully soon.

In the meantime, I've enjoyed blogging this semester so much that I'm starting a new blog: anundefinedlife.wordpress.com - for the time being, it will be more about my adventures at my new summer internship, but I'm also hoping to use it just to reflect on questions that come to mind.

However, because of this new blog, this means that this is the last post on Life on an Island. Again, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!

Best,
Dana

So long, farewell, auf Widersehen, goodbye.

Goodbyes have never been my forté.

It has taken me over 20 years to realize this fact about myself, and it’ll probably take another 20 before it truly changes (though let’s not think about me at 40 please).

I don’t really know how or why that is the case, but I’m just really bad about letting things go. I can probably recount most of my embarassing moments from high school that everyone else has forgotten. I have a stack of newspapers from the colleges that I toured in high school sitting in my bedroom at home, and I know exactly where they are. I have shoeboxes full of letters and cards from people, some of which go back to middle school when one of my best friends would go to sleep away camp every summer and send me letters telling me what she had been up to. I can’t properly clean my room because I always get attached to things from my childhood (this might be an early sign of hoarding, I’m not too sure.).

And it’s not just things. If you’ve ever skyped with me, I’ve gotten pretty good at awkward goodbyes. It’ll take me forever to finally say I need to go and do something else. In person, I never know what’s appropriate as a goodbye. Do you wave, or hug, or awkwardly fidget and walk away? I never really know. (I apologize if you’ve gotten the last one from me before, I promise it’s not you it’s me)

So coming into this study abroad experience, I think I unintentionally came in with a wall around myself. I would become acquaintances with my classmates, but not get too close or too attached because I knew I would only be with them for 4 months and then probably never see them again. I wouldn’t get too close to the girls in my foyer because many of them live on the other side of the world and online connections don’t always work well. Goodbyes are hard enough, so why make them more difficult?

But ironically enough, maybe because of all the time I spent wandering the city alone, I grew attached to Paris itself. From the way the repairman at my foyer says “hello” (“hey-low”) to the sirens of police cars and the endless honking battles to the bakeries around every corner, somewhere along the way I grew to love this city. And with that, I opened up to people, made new friends, and enjoyed my time here. The chances of me seeing some of my friends again once we’re back in the States are slim, but the pictures and memories of them will always be with me.

In exactly a week from today, I’ll be on a plane back to Washington, D.C. Tonight was the final official get together of my program. Students, directors, coworkers, and tutors came together, sharing stories and food and cherishing our last moments as a group. Our 30 page research papers are due tomorrow, signifying the official end of my semester abroad. I got to work today and there was a note from two of my colleagues because I forgot to say goodbye yesterday (again with me being bad with goodbyes, though I honestly forgot they worked part time). Today was technically the last day of my internship, and my boss took me and my co workers out for lunch. Despite the language barrier, these are people that I will hold near and dear to my heart because they’re the ones who taught me so much this semester.

People have asked me what my favorite city has been while travelling. I can’t lie and say I didn’t enjoy Dublin and London, because those are definitely places I’d love to revisit. But Paris has become one of my absolute favorite places in the world. Despite the trash, the unpredictable and cold weather (I still have to wear a jacket outside and it’s the end of May), and the number of times I’ve been creeped on, there’s a certain charm about this city. Maybe it’s the incredibly well-dressed children who speak better French than I do and in a cuter voice. Or maybe it’s the mix of aromas as you walk through an open-air market. Or maybe it’s the surprise of encountering an employee who is genuinely friendly instead of one who doesn’t seem to care (anecdote of the week: I went shopping after work on Monday and went into this boutique close to where I live to look for a gift for my sister. I talked to the employee for a little bit since I was the only customer, then entered the fitting room with three pieces. Soon after, the same employee opened my door to hand me more pieces that I - or my sister - might like based on what I had originally picked out. After maybe 15-20 minutes in the dressing room, I walked out with maybe 16 pieces in hand thanks to this one employee). I wish I could accurately express what makes this place so magical, but I suppose that’s part of the allure of the city.

While I may never figure out why I love this place so much (though I tell people it’s the food, because let’s be honest that’s a very true statement), I do know for sure that this is one of the hardest goodbyes I will ever have to say. Thinking about it in French makes it a little easier, as goodbye in French is “au revoir,” which literally translates to, “to the next time we see each other” (or something along those lines). There’s less of a sense of finality in French. I’d like to think that one day I’ll be back here once again, but I have no clue where I’m headed in the future, so only time will tell.

And in regards to the unclear future, I leave you with the words of J.M. Barrie (Peter Pan) : "Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting."

A tout,
Dana

P.S. If you want a souvenir, now is your chance to ask!

Save Tonight

Hi guys!

Has it really been a week since I last posted? Time has been flying by in this last month, and it’s crazy to think that in a little over two weeks from today I’ll be on a plane with my brother headed back to the US. Where have the last 4 months gone?

Today I took my last exam for my seminar on Europe, so I figured as a treat for myself (instead of eating my feelings), I’d blog. Unfortunately, this will be one of my last posts, if not the last. I have to write at least 20 more pages for my research paper before next Friday, when it’s due. Then after that, my brother’s coming into town bright and early and I’ll be off showing him all of the places that I’ve fallen in love with. Until my paper’s done I’ll be MIA, and after that we’ll see how busy I am.

But before I start rambling on and on about my time here and how much I love this place, I have one other topic to cover – London! Not long after I last blogged, I boarded the Eurostar train and took the chunnel to London! I wasn’t as exciting on the way there because it was dark and I couldn’t tell the difference between the night sky and the tunnel, but on the way back to Paris you realize you’re in a tunnel for about 20 minutes. I’ve always liked trains, so the trip there and back was fun for me.

My dad told me to take a picture of the chunnel. So I did.

London itself though is a great city – if you have a chance to go, I would recommend it. Granted, after 4 days we were exhausted from walking around so much (mostly due to getting lost…), but there’s so much to do and to discover. Most of the tourist attractions have pretty expensive admission fees, but it was fun at least to see all the sights in person (we did splurge once at my request to ride the London Eye). One thing that Laura and I noticed early on was that in comparison to Paris, London is oddly quiet. I don’t know what made it so different, because there were still plenty of cars around, but it just felt calmer. It was different, but in a good way. 

No tourists were harmed in the taking of this photo.

One thing I realized about myself while in London was that the two public transit systems I know are both called the “metro.”  Which meant I was utterly incapable of referring to the London Underground system as the “underground” or the “tube.” I tried, really, but when you’ve grown up 5 minutes away from a metro stop, there are some things you can’t change about a person. I also was greatly confused and entertained by their identification system of the lines, with names like Piccadilly or Jubilee. My brain apparently only processes colors and numbers…this made travelling a little more difficult for me. But overall I had a great time in London, and while I don’t know if I’ll ever make it back there, I’m so glad I had an opportunity to spend a few days there.

After my short vacation, I’m once again back in Paris. Lately I’ve been jumping between missing my friends at home who are now already on summer break and realizing I have to leave soon (my visa expires in June). Before this semester, the longest I had been away from the States was probably 3 weeks, maybe a month, and with my family or someone responsible for me. While I haven’t been necessarily alone on this journey, I live in my own room and am responsible for my finances and daily life. And I’ve been doing this for 4 months now. My time abroad has changed my view of the world and of the United States, and of myself.  I’ve been travelling for as long as I can remember, and when I was applying to colleges, studying abroad was one of my big requirements. But after this time, I’ve come to realize that travelling isn’t just about being a tourist and going to the big expensive sights. It’s about embracing the culture that you’re in and not being afraid of trying new things. It’s not about going to the familiar places, but getting lost in the unknown. This semester for me has been about taking in another culture, and learning more about myself in the process. I’ve definitely had my weak points along the way, have given into American food cravings (I only went to Chipotle 3 times, I promise!) and speak English more than I should, but I’ve also eaten Lebanese food at an open air market at Bastille, had conversations with a French person about our lives over coffee at a café, and seen a play entirely in French. I’m not the same person that I was when I stepped onto my flight to Paris in January and said goodbye to Washington D.C. My time here has been absolutely unforgettable, and I’m incredibly grateful for this opportunity and for what Paris has taught me. I apologize in advance for when I go home and I only talk about this semester. I promise to cut down on the stories after a while…or at least I’ll try.

Since starting this semester, I have written in a journal every day. Most of it has been just to capture everything I did every day, but on my first day in Paris (I think my dad was taking a nap), I wrote down 6 goals for myself:

- Meet new people, both American and French (or neither!)

- Improve my French (to a point where I can comfortably speak and have a conversation)

- Reevaluate my relationships at home – who am I going to be friends with in the long run? Who will take the time to keep in touch with me?

- Explore a new(ish) country

- Find my passion – what do I want to do with my life?

- Journal daily

I’m happy to say that I think I’ve accomplished all of the things I had set out to do, plus much more. At first it was weird to think that I wouldn’t be spending another semester in the burg, but now I can’t imagine spending this spring anywhere else. 

And thank you all who have been reading my blog and keeping up with me. I have appreciated every Skype call, email, Facebook like, all of it. I’ve loved sharing my life with you. Post Paris, I might continue to post on here occasionally, to document my transition back to being an American. I’m excited for all the adventures that await me!

Love,

Dana    

The four week countdown

Hi guys!

So, I've known that I owe you a blog post, but the last couple of days have been pretty busy and crazy, so here's a quick update for now.

On Saturday, I took a day trip out of Paris to go to Giverny, where Claude Monet lived. As previously established, I love flowers, so I was freaking out the whole time as I got to wander through his gardens and house. I may have taken about 250 photos just of flowers...that's normal right? Needless to say, I had a really good time. Getting there was a little stressful though - I went in the morning, and when I got to the train station in Paris I had to buy my ticket, but I couldn't figure out how to buy it on the machines, so I had to get in line to buy the ticket from the counter. I bought my ticket 4 minutes before the train left, but thankfully I made it. But then once on the train I had to stay awake so I wouldn't miss my stop, then I had to find the shuttle to Giverny (the train went to Vernon, a town about 10 minutes away across the Seine). But thankfully, things worked out and it was a great trip. If you're ever in Paris in the spring/summer, and you like flowers/art, I would definitely recommend the trip. I'll post some pictures later on from the trip.

Since my trip, I've been trying to get some work done - not only do I have my paper to work on, but I also have a presentation tonight and an exam next week so I'm feeling more like a student than an intern at the moment. But on the bright side, and another reason why these past couple of days have been crazy, is that I'm leaving for London tonight! Tomorrow is a work holiday to celebrate the end of WWII, and Thursday is Ascension so I'm off both days, and I took Friday off so I wouldn't have to rush home. I've never been to London (besides one layover in Heathrow), so I'm really excited! I can't wait to share my adventures with you all! Today itself is pretty crazy because after my internship, I have my seminar and presentation, then I go straight to the train station to go to London. Once I'm on the train, I'll be less stressed (hopefully).

So I think that's an accurate summary of my life right now - I apologize if I'm rambling or making little sense. I learned a couple things last night - 1) the fire alarm in my foyer works quite well and 2) one 3.5 hour nap + one 3 hour nap won't equal 6.5 hours of straight sleep. For the first time since being here, the fire alarm went off at 3:45 in the morning; And someone pulled it as a joke. I take back all my complaints about fire alarms back home, because at least y'all have the sense to set them off at more reasonable times (not so much Yates, but they were still better than this one). It's only noon and I'm beginning to crash. Thanks, random stranger.

I'm gonna go find caffeine or sneak a nap into work...until next time!

Dana

A big bowl of culture

Coucou –

Hi guys! Sorry for the little hiatus, but I’m back! Oral defense is done, but now I actually have to write my dissertation – 3 pages down, 27 more to go! This weekend hasn’t been too exciting because I’ve been locking myself in my room to write (or at least try to).

Luckily though, Friday night, my friend Laura and I went to the Comédie-Française to see Phèdre, by Racine, who my seat neighbor described as the French Shakespeare. Admittedly I spent most of the performance not quite knowing what was going on (I knew someone had died but not really, there was a crazy lady, then my favorite character died a gruesome death – that sums it up, right?), but I really enjoying going none the less. The best part though – our tickets were only 5 euros! For all the shows in the main theater (Salle Richelieu), the company has 65 limited visibility seats available for sale an hour before the show begins, which sell for 5 euros at the little ticket office (“petit bureau”) on the side of the theater. And when they say limited visibility, they mean it. My seat was on the 1^st balcony all the way to the edge right by the stage, so I could only actually see half the stage. I didn’t learn that there was a desk on the stage until after the show when Laura told me (she was sitting on the other side of the theater, one floor up). It was still really fun to go all dressed up and enjoy a night of French culture. Plus Pierre Niney (who was in the film "20 ans d'ecart") was in the show which made it more exciting because he's really impressive (and awkward).

(pictures once blogspot let's me upload them)

I’m sharing this story though because for me it’s a reminder of the accessibility of French culture. Sure, in the States it’s pretty easy to find shows to see, but tickets are expensive - even the discount tickets on Broadway are more expensive (my sister and I once saw Bring it on: the Musical and we paid $15 for standing room only tickets). If you wait until the last minute in Paris, you can find some pretty good prices. And it’s not just for theater. The first Sunday of every month, all of the public museums (some of the monuments too) are free to everyone. Granted, that sometimes means long lines and crowds, but still, it’s cheap. And for students studying in the European Union, many of these museums are free on a daily basis with proper identification. Since I’m on a long-stay student visa, I can just show a copy of my visa and profit from this rule (you can only legally stay in France without a visa for 3 months). But even if I wasn’t a student here, if you’re under 26, most places will still give you a reduced fare. So far I’ve gotten into Musée d’Orsay, Musée du Louvre and Musée Rodin all for free.

A lot of these laws stem from France’s attempt to encourage youth to learn about art and culture starting at a young age, which I find really interesting. If you think about the Pompidou Center, which is the modern art museum, there’s a library inside the museum to encourage students to combine education and culture. I wrote an exam paper on this earlier this semester, but it wasn’t until recently that I realized how much I was learning and profiting from it. 

I still have a month left here, and I’m hoping to profit from this cultural emphasis even more in my time here. It’s scary to think that I’ve been here for almost four months when sometimes it doesn’t even feel like it. I’m excited to go home eventually, but at the same time I’m already getting a little sad that I have to leave this city so soon. There’s so much left to do, and I’m hoping that this month I’ll be able to accomplish a lot (work and travel wise). So far I’ve got trips to London, Cannes (film festival anyone?) and Nice scheduled, but we’ll see what else happens along the way. 

And for all of those who have been keeping up with this blog, merci beaucoup. A tout!

Bises, Dana

Photos

Hey guys!

Quick note - I realized some of you might not be connected to Facebook, and I also realized that I've taken plenty of photos lately that have not made it on my page, so I now have a photobucket account for those pictures (it's not my favorite system, but it works).

For more of my photos from Parc Floral, click here.

Bonne journée!
Dana

Let's see how far we've come.

Hi again!

Possibly the last post from me a little bit – I have my oral defense of my memoir next week so I really need to start focusing on that and writing my memoir. I’ll update when I can, but no promises.

Anyways, something I’ve been thinking about a lot have been the expectations I had had for Paris before coming here, and how they’ve changed after living here for 3 months (which, let’s be honest, is crazy to think about). I’ve realized that I had a lot of stereotypes in mind before travelling, and that looking back now there are also some things that I wouldn’t have expected.

1, The French are rude:  While yes, this is generally true, I’ve come across people who have genuinely surprised me. When I first got to Paris and had to buy my metro pass, the lady at the metro station walked me through the whole process and made sure I understood everything. After work one day, I went to my favorite chocolatier (which also sells macarons), and when I asked one of the sales people if I could sample a broken macaron (technically you can’t sell a broken one), she gave me a perfect macaron of her favorite flavor and smiled at me.  Last week, I had the opportunity to go to an art exposition inauguration (no big deal, right?) at the Institut du Monde Arabe, which has one of the best rooftop views of Paris. While I didn’t have an invitation to the inauguration party, the man at the entrance told me how to get to the terrace on the roof. From there the guard manning the terrace entrance let me go out there for a few minutes despite not being a paying customer at the café or being part of the party. So really, not all Parisians are that bad – sometimes you just need to ask for help.

2, I would travel all the time: Before leaving the States, I had a big picture idea of what my semester would be like. I would take classes, then intern, and over the weekend I would jet off to different cities in different countries just because I could. As of this weekend, it’s been a month since I’ve left Paris. As much as I’d like to travel, I just don’t have the time and energy that I thought I would.  During the week, I’m at the office about 8 hours a day, plus our weekly seminar after work. By the time I get home, it’s usually almost time for dinner and then I get a few hours to myself before going to bed. When the weekend comes around, all I want to do is sleep or run the errands I forgot to do during the week. Plus if I really wanted to take advantage of visiting a new city, I would have to leave early Saturday and come back late Sunday, which to me is rather crazy. And I’m glad it’s worked out this way. I’m still getting chances to travel, but I’m also getting to see more of Paris, and the less touristy side of things. Every day I fall more and more in love with this city, and I can’t even think about leaving it now (we’ll worry about that later).

3, I would only have French friends: This one was a stretch, but I was really hoping to meet French people my age to get to know and to talk with in French. Unfortunately, my foyer is full of international students, which makes it harder to meet French people. And even when I meet French people, sometimes they want to speak in English as to improve their language skills. Even though I haven’t met the people I thought I would, I’ve made some good friends here and I’m still grateful for that. 

I’ll probably add to this list soon, but those were the big ones I could think of at the moment. But in other news, today was 70+ degrees (Fahrenheit) and absolutely wonderful. We sat by the Seine for hours just enjoying the weather and the people around us. Paris never ceases to amaze me.

Dana 

P.S. anyone get the title reference?